one down, a lot to go
ME AND KELLY GOT A ROOM AT THE HARD ROCK FOR OUR 1ST ANNIVERSARY. WE TOOK THE DOG TOO. FUN TIMES. I WANTED TO GAMBLE BUT I'M POOR WITH HOLES IN MY SOCKS. WE DID HOWEVER GO TO A NICE MEXICAN RESTURANT FOR DINNER, AND KELLY TAUGHT ME A LITTLE SPANISH. I FORGOT MOST OF IT, BUT IT WAS A GREAT NIGHT.
sick day
I'M SICK AS SHIT AND I DON'T WANT TO WRITE ABOUT ANYTHING SUBSTANTIAL CUZ EVERY ARTICLE I COME ACROSS IS ALL ABOUT TNA, ALCOHOLE, DRUGS, AND BOO HOO DADDY LEFT ME SHIT. IT'S AMAZING HOW TRAPPED PEOPLE GET WHEN THEY ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN. MOVE ON DAMN YOU!
THE ONLY THING THAT'S GONNA PUT ME IN A GOOD MOOD NOW IS LISTENING TO MATT GOOD OR READING AL FRANKEN. WHO WILL WIN THE COIN TOSS? BOTH.
phone
I WANT TO HANG UP ON MY FRIEND. BUT NOT CUZ HE'S BORING ME BUT CUZ I'M IN A BAD MOOD. HE'S BLABBING ABOUT THIS RESTURANT THAT'S CLOSE TO DOWNTOWN THAT HAS HULA DANCERS WEARING NEXT TO NOTHING. NEATO. I'M GONNA TELL HIM I'M TIRED. BYE FRIEND. OKAY HE'S GONE. WHERE WAS I? I DON'T KNOW ANYMORE. THIS BLOG IS REALLY PISSING ME OFF CUZ I CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO DO THE COOL THINGS LIKE THAT RAYMITHEMINX GIRL DOES. I'M JEALOUS OF HER CUZ SHE'S COOL AND I'M NOT. I'M GONNA START TAKING NAKED PICS OF ME FOR FUN LIKE HER. SHE'S GOT A PLAN AND MINE IS ONLY TO DO THE SAME DAMN THING WEEK AFTER WEEK UNTIL SOMETHING GREAT FALLS IN MY LAP. NOT THAT I'M A LAZY ASS BUT LIVING IN WISC AND IN FL I SAW/SEE MANY MANY PEOPLE WORKING EXTREMELY HARD FOR SHITTY PAY. I'M NOT GONNA DO THAT ANYMORE. STRESS BLOWS. WHY PUT YOURSELF THROUGH IT IF YOU CAN LIKE ME, STEP ON IT LIKE A BUG AND WALK AWAY.
AHHHHHHHH
Today was shit. I'm tired and didn't get any from my wife. Boo! She bought some really cute undees and was showing them to me while I was talking to a dear friend of mine. Shit, now my phone is ringing. Damn it!
dislikes
TOP 10 THINGS I DISLIKE THE MOST IN NO PARTICULAR ORDER:
1. SMALL DOGS WITH A NAPOLEON COMPLEX
2. COFFEE
3. SNOT
4. DARK BEER
5. RED NEX
6. COUNTRY MUSIC
7. PEOPLE WHO DON'T READ BOOKS
8. PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIKE NAPOLEON DYNAMITE
9. WORKING IN RETAIL
10. TRASH (ALL SKIN COLORS)
mucus man
I WENT HOME LAST WEEK AND CAME BACK WITH THE PLAGUE. COUGHING ALL NIGHT CAN REALLY MAKE TIME MOVE AT ITS ABSOLUTE SLOWEST. I GOT FED UP WITH FEELING LIKE BRUSED TURD AND WENT TO THE GYM TO PUNISH THE PLEGHEM THAT DECIDED IT VACATION ITSELF INSIDE MY BODY FOR OVER A WEEK. NOW I’M BACK HOME AND I STILL FEEL LIKE ASS. TOUCH ME.TODAY I THINK I’LL START AL FRANKEN’S NEW BOOK. I MADE MY MA GET IT FOR ME FOR CHRISTMAS CUZ I WANTED HER REPUBLICAN MONEY TO BUY A LIBERAL BOOK. I ROCK.
dead today
LAST NIGHT ME AND MY WIFE CELEBRATED NEW YEARS AT MY BAR ON LAS OLAS WHICH WAS PACKED AND SMELLED LIKE B.O. I SMELLED TO YAY! I THINK I GOT TO BED BY 7AM WHICH SUCKED CUZ MY FUCKING NIEGHBORS DOGS FOR SOME REASON FEELS THE NEED TO BARK FOR 5 HOURS STRAIGHT STARTING AT 9AM OR WHENEVER IT'S VERY OLD OWNER HAS TO LEAVE FOR BINGO. I WAS SO PISSED I FINALLY LEFT HER A NOTE. "DEAR NIEGHBOR, YOUR DOG SUCKS AND BARKS FOR 5 HOURS STRAIGHT EVERYDAY. SOMETIMES WHEN YOU'RE THERE TOO. ARE YOU WAITING FOR ME TO HAS A STROKE CUZ OF IT SO WE CAN EXCHANGE STORIES?" WHAT A DICK.
ME AND MY WIFE ARE SICK NOW FOR THE 5TH DAY IN A ROW AND I'M TOO LAZY TO GO TO THE DR. CUZ I'M DUMB LIKE THAT SOMETIMES. FUCK IT I'LL GO. AFTER I BEAT MY NEIGHBOR WITH A LOAF OF BREAD.
K
